Dreams can be a funny thing. I’ve always had very vivid dreams that I can remember easily. Sometimes it frightens me because they can feel so real. I awoke for the last time at 4:45 this morning to a dream, or better yet a nightmare, that wouldn’t allow me to go back to sleep. Not that I really wanted to anyhow. Ever since I’ve become a parent I’ve learned what it means to love unconditionally. I love my husband, but in a way that is different in how I love our child. In my dream someone was trying to take my daughter from me and I was having to do everything I could to try and stop them. I clawed and kicked and screamed, flailing my limbs wildly. It was one of those dreams in which subconsciously you are doing everything you can to try and wake up. And after what felt like torture, I did–gasping and shaking. I’m not one for cuddling but I found my way over to my husband and grabbed his hand to try and ease my unsettled nerves.
With only three weeks or less until I get to meet my new baby, sleep has become something I don’t get as often as I used to. Going to sleep isn’t the problem, it’s just staying asleep that is. Especially with the vivid dreams, constant bathroom breaks, and this steadily growing fetus that’s packing on about an ounce a day. As of two weeks ago she was weighing approximately 6.5 lbs, so no telling where she’s at now. It’s hard to get comfortable when there’s a basketball attached to you that’s constantly shifting. Sometimes I look at my family while their sleeping, seeing how peaceful they are makes me happy. And then I’d also like to think that this disruption in my sleep schedule is only bettering me for the lack of sleep I’m about to endure once more with a newborn. Thank goodness for nesting or I would be a walking zombie through out the day.